"You change the energy in the room" is what he said
... and he didn't mean it in a good way. And at that moment I turned down my flame.
It's been gradual, but I can say at this point I've been operating on low flame for a minute. That was more than a decade ago, and now it all makes sense... my creativity hasn't been boiling over because I have the flame too low.
It's amazing what a little journaling will uncover. Now, I've been a fan of journaling since I was a child but this past month has been very different. A uterine fibroid diagnosis over the summer encouraged a deeper dive into healthy living, which includes mental, physical, and spiritual alignment. My mornings now begin at around 5 am since purchasing Queen Afua's Sacred Woman. There is a list of things that are included in my morning but a focused journaling approach is one of them.
This process encourages several lifestyle and diet changes. I admit I have been both resistant and scared at times. Resistant to change and scared of what I might find out about myself. I was scared of myself. I remember the other woman, the old me, and I try not to visit her often. This new( to me ) journaling approach has me uncovering the roots of some of my thoughts and actions. Forgotten comments and experiences are coming up and this week his comment came up: You change the energy in the room. Now I always have known about my magnetism and charisma, it's what makes me a good artist, but that was the first time I thought of the darker side. When he made the comment I began to think something was wrong with me, and how could I lessen my impact on others. I turned down my inner flame and unknowingly decreasing my charisma. I was scared of scorching someone but the flame was way too low. Turning my inner flame down meant that I haven't created at the magnitude that I really need to be, because I told myself not to negatively impact others. And now it all makes sense... my creativity hasn't been boiling over because I have the flame to low.
I am thankful that the journaling helped me uncover the root of this stagnation and I'm ready to make a change. Intense and Passionate is part of who I am. Loving me includes the good, bad, and ugly parts of myself. New message to self: Stand Up, Be Present, and Radiate. Let them feel and see you. I finally understand the Alicia key song " This girl on fire"
👩🏾🔬 So if like me, you can really change the energy room; Let’s try an experiment:
imagine a peaceful blessed day or the life of your dreams.
What does it look and feel like? Once you have that in your mind open your eyes and look for proof.
✨focus on finding proof.
✨They say what you focus on magnifies so what if you focused on proof of your peaceful uplifting day.
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💛Mya
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